Five Celebrities in Need of a Re-Brand

[Quashspeak returns November 2014]

Like it or not, we have a fixation with the famous, in our society. It may have always been true, but in today's world, our infatuation with celebrities is further fueled by the growing number of 24/7 platforms dedicated to the escapades of public figures. We gawk at and critique the celebrities, some of which go through life with one mishap after another. And while we applaud their success; their failures are better meals for our obsession and we just can't get enough.

Some A-listers seem to skate through the playground of celebrity, unscathed. But for every publicly-praised George Clooney or Robert Griffin III, we've watched the spiraling downfalls of Lindsay Lohan and Lance Armstrong. For this edition, we'll forgo the bad behaviors of the Justin Biebers and Chris Browns, for now, and focus on the celebs who are 30 and over.

Columbus Short

The Issue: The 31-year-old actor was recently released (the euphenism for 'fired' in TV talk) from his role on ABC's Scandal. While it is true that the TV series relishes frequent watercooler OMG moments and his character was last seen facing the barrel of a gun in last month's season finale, Short's tenure could not have been helped by his recent activities, including an alleged knife-wielding threat on his wife, two public fist fights and an uneasy interview with radio host Tom Joyner, in which he called the radio host the N word.
How To Re-Brand: Considering the allegations, Short might do well to embrace some humility and acknowledge his mistakes (think Hugh Grant). His next role, hopefully a likable character audiences can cheer for, should shed light on any acting skills and put some distance between him and the recent charges. (Case study: Robert Downey, Jr.)



M. Night Shyamalan

The Issue: The 43-year-old director created a buzz with his twist-ending phenomenom The Sixth Sense, back in 1999. Not only was the thriller the second highest box office earner of the year, but it was also nominated for an Academy Award for Best Picture and Shyamalan earned a nod for Best Director. His next few films, Unbreakable, Signs and The Village, had their own twist endings as well and M. Night became categorized as a one trick pony. So, he tried other types of films, most notably The Last Airbender and the Will Smith vehicle After Earth, both of which were panned by critics and neither beloved by moviegoers. Has he already made his best film?
How To Re-Brand: The director's name is becoming linked to big budget flops. He needs a strong screenplay and a sound cast to exercise his skills at directing and take on a character-driven story. He'll need to demonstrate what he can do without special effects or sci-fi (Case study: Steven Spielberg).


J.K. Rowling

The Issue: The rags to riches story of the 48-year-old British author who penned the Harry Potter seven-book series is legendary. Rowling is credited with almost single-handedly getting young adults (and many an adult) to read again. And while the series has been wildly successful (2007's Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows was the fastest selling book of all time then), the movies have been too -- the franchise has made $7.7 billion worldwide. After apparently moving on from Potter (Rowling wrote children's books and adult novels), she also cannot seem to let go of the wizard world she created. Not unlike George Lucas who had continued tinkering with Star Wars, Rowling has developed a website, at least three supplemental works to Potter, a Potter prequel and hints at another full-fledged series to take place decades before Potter.
How To Re-Brand: Staying with one story line for an entire career? Ian Fleming may be the exception to the rule, but the Potter tale has a finite ending and Rowling's forced additions could tarnish her brand and that of the series (did anyone really love those last three Star Wars films?). She will need to write a strong story that is 180 degrees from fantasy and helps to cement her position as a literary force. (Case study: John Grisham)


Tom Cruise

The Issue: Just eight years ago, Forbes named Cruise the world's most powerful celebrity. So why a re-brand? Well, what was the last Cruise film you raved about? Oblivion? Jack Reacher? Rock of Ages? No, it was likely one of the Mission Impossible films, his sinister turn opposite Jamie Foxx in Collateral or his comedic cameo in Tropic Thunder. Yes, Tom Cruise can still play cool, but his recent cinematic choices have been head scratchers and his reign at the box office continues to slip.
How To Re-Brand: Cruise does have three Oscar nominations under his belt (Born on the Fourth of July, Jerry Maguire and most recently, 2000's Magnolia), and at 51, he may not have quite that many years left in high octane-fueled action films. Cruise can do comedy and supporting roles well and may want to choose a script and director that will let him shine rather than the heavy, bleak roles of late.
(Case study: Bruce Willis)

Britney Spears

The Issue: Maybe it wasn't really about her music after all. Perhaps it was the family feuds, her brief marriage, her barefoot-in-the-public-bathroom escapades or her "bad mom" antics that enthralled us.  But today, we hear little about the impact of Britney's music or of the 32-year-old herself. The major coup of snagging Spears as a judge on the second season of X Factor landed with a thud. And her last album was the lowest selling of her career. Once the pop icon of her generation, she's been eclipsed by Lady Gaga and Miley Cyrus in the "outrageous" department and overshadowed by Beyonce and Taylor Swift on the charts.
How To Re-Brand: Time will tell if her new Vegas show helps to remind audiences of her pop icon status. The danger here is that she may become predictable and then, alas, boring. She'll need to keep up with the times to remind us of anything she's done beyond yesteryear to remain relevant and fresh.
(Case study: Justin Timberlake)


We love our celebrities, but we chide them when they stray and then applaud them again when they rise up. As much as we are obsessed with celebrity, we love a good comeback story even more.

--Tom Quash